Immutable

What is the meaning of life? If you see everything in a constant state of decay, as I do, then you must find a reason to resist your inevitable end. God just doesn't do it for me. It seems to me that religion drives people to passionate irresponsibilty. Every Christian I know doesn't question the Bible. Many of them don't question what their churches tell them, either. If they do question something, they go to their church for reassurance, rather than seeking a different view. Believe what you want, I say. Live and let live. Killing is wrong, but not killing in the name of god. And I'm not talking about not defending yourself. But I really doubt Christians seek out viewpoints that counter their churches. And why would they? Doesn't the church act in the best interest of it's members? I have been in a church and read the little magazines they have around, telling about how Jews are going to hell and how teaching kids about sex is encouraging them. Most of what I have heard in churches all my life is fear. Fear of going to hell, fear of not having control, fear of not being a "good Christian." Seriously. There was a reason why our forefathers wanted a separation of church and state. They were educated men. They wanted protection from corparate entities, as well. It seems as though the line between state interests and corporate interests is more transparent than ever, at least to me. But if I see religion used by corprations or politicians to move voters, I see an end result of my freedom comprimised. I think the forefathers of this country knew the meaning of life. It is to be free, be happy and be respected.

OUCH!!

I have feeling really clumsy, lately. I keep ramming my hands into things when I reach for them and tripping over little cracks in sidewalks. It sucks. Masturbation has become a dangerous endevour. I am afraid I am going to slip off the end and punch myself in the face. Which would be alright if I was in that kind of mood, but what if I'm not? They say love hurts, why would self love be any different? I went to scratch my face and ended up poking myself in the eye. I feel like a character from "Airplane" with a drinking disorder, only mine is a moving disorder. But it doesn't seem to affect my riding. I haven't noticed that I am wildly out of control. Which is funny, because flatland requires such precise movement and timing and balance. Maybe this disorder is saving up for a big one. Hmmmmmmm... OUCH! Man, I swear!! While I was typing this, I went to itch my nose and ended up cramming my finger up my nose half-way to my brain!! I should never have quit frog licking cold turkey!
~J

News Flash

I love being a dad. I may not be the best (don't know why I care...silly), but I get a kick out of these monsters.
~J

Kids these days...

Let's face it, being "pro-choice" or "pro-life" doesn't deal with anything. You are taking a stand on an issue comprised of smoke and mirrors. I have had conversations with people who are simultaneously pro-life and anti-welfare. They literally expect that 16 year old girl to raise her baby, get an education, work and learn to be a parent (much less an adult!) at the same time. I assume that expectation is based on taking responsibilty for ones actions. But we can't expect many children to take responsibility because many people are opposed to real sexual education. Many people are "morally opposed" to condoms being freely available to teens, even though our society is so completely saturated with false sexual ideas and imagery that teens wear their sex like a corporate logo. The thought of my kids facing the pressures to emulate what they see on t.v., movies and magazines scares me, but all I can do is fill their minds with reality and trust them. I have bought car magazines simply because of the woman on the cover is HOT and I feel no shame in doing so, but I know that she is entertainment in her uniform of steamy bikini tan lines, as opposed to an expectation. I see very young girls all the time wearing very skimpy clothes and makeup. Which is fine, really, as long as they know what it is they are doing. They are exagerating their beauty, not becoming normal. Looking like a woman, is not being a woman, but kids have enough knowledge to be dangerous. So either give them the tools, information and support to make informed decisions or give them what they need after the decision has been made. "Pro-life" or "pro-choice" is not "pro-solution" but rather "pro-politic."
~J

Punch me

I am reading a new book, called, "Manufacturing Consent: The Political Economy of the Mass Media" by Edward Herman and Noam Chomsky. It is about propaganda in America, or more precisely, the way powerful corporations are conglomerating the media into fewer and fewer avenues by which we can recieve information. By narrowing our opinions through bombardment and forcing our attention away from issues that are not politcally advantageous, our view of the world is partially defined. Like, for example, the massacres that are taking place in Sudan of christians. George W. Bush, who ran a campaign based on his "moral values" acted only after pressure from christian groups was focussed on him before his campaign. His action? To denounce the genocide. Thousands of poeple are killed everyday and we will not hear about it on the evening news simply because our government doesn't want us to. Christian, Muslim, Jew, Islami, whatever...if you don't worship power, then your world is not your own. Allow your faith or belief to guide you without the need for religion. I haven't read the whole Bible, but what I have read lead me to think that killing was wrong, lying was wrong, greed was wrong. Our "leaders" are not religious. Our "leaders" are not moral. Our "leaders" don't have a conscience. Our "leaders" are not spiritual. They worship power, not Jesus, not Jehova, not Allah. They don't even worship money. You are lied to a thousand times a day in more ways than you realize and still you sit there and when someone tries to open your eyes to them you think to yourself, " I hate this conspiracy theory shit." If you sought out just two sources completely outside the mass media, you'd be surprised at what America has done to the world. What America is doing to the world. All I am suggesting is that you try, that you be aware. Read any book by Noam Chomsky or go to www.alernativeradio.org .
~J

Did'ja Beat 'em?

We started out the day having an incredible session with all the guys. Hagness, Justin, Darrell (brought those bars for me WHOO-HOO!), Joe, Tzim, Scuffinator and me all at the Beav courts. After a day of riding, Joe, Scuff, Tzim and I were not done, so we went in search of the golden lot Justin had found, but I am pretty sure it was locked up like a Hell's Angel's jaw on tetnis after a gang war. Next we were shown the most ridable place I have ever witnessed, Grant tennis courts. Incredible lighting, smooth, perfect surface and enough space for Rosie O'Donnell's family reunion, we were shredding right up until 10 o'clock, when the lights heard the fat lady sing. Joe and Tzim had had enough, so Scuff and I headed to Templeton, where we met the biggest idiot I have ever seen hold a job....besides the president.
We got out of the car and noticed a nice shiny new gate. Then we noticed some fat dude sauntering accross the parking lot. "Can I help you?" "No, we're just gonna do a little bit of riding" "Not here, you're not" Fill in the rest of the conversation with the most stupid things any nerd has ever said. He told us that there were cameras, senors and scanners all over the school and we'd set them all off if we rode. Paul asked when they installed those because we had just been riding here a week ago and saw nothing like that.
"They put them in after I had two guys hauled off in cuffs because they wouldn't leave," he said. I asked, "Did'ja beat 'em?" To which he replied, "I wanted to." At that point Sarge was incredulous. Fill in a little more idiotic boasting. We both left him gleaming in the afterglow of having completely asserted his manliness by intimidating two grown men who probably could have killed him without too much trouble. I'll bet that retard voted for Bush, too. Never should have let him live.
~J

Shredder

Ok, so I bought this paper shredder, yesterday. I like it, it's destructive. I had a bunch of stuff I wanted to shred, so I started and I got it all done pretty quickly. Old bills, bank statements, unpaid tickets, etc. But you know, I just didn't want to stop. Now, I knew that my ex-wife wouldn't fit, so that pretty much ruled out my plans to make sure that the 2008 presidential election went the way I wanted, since she is a crank junkie and would fit before any fat "conservative" would. So I decided to start with the cat. It took some work, but I did it. Man, what a sight...until the motor gave up half-way through. But no problem, I just hooked up the motor out of my old vacuum. Next, I wanted to do something that would benefit the world in some way. I know, I know...trying to be mother Theresa. So what I came up with is this...I am going to shred those Goddamned AOL cd's that they send me every fucking month!! I mean, what do they think? That if they send enough, I'll think to myself, "Wow, I guess I do want to support a world-wide media tyrant, thereby erradicating free interaction of ideas and marginalizing public awareness?" Fuckin assholes. Next it'll be anything having to do with McDonald's, then ...I need a bigger shredder, there's just no getting around it. I want to fit a Chevy into it.
~J

Importance

I got to ride, today for a short period of time. It was great, but I miss getting to ride twice a week and weekends. I notice that my progression is greatly slowed and my pain has increased. But the time I DO get on my bike is so great. Man, I seriously hope I never have to stop flatlanding. And I have to say something about Hagness. That guy has a bottomless knowledge of what it takes to do a trick. Today, when I was trying hang-ten to half-packer without touching the bars, the way I have been doing. I remembered something Hagness said to me about applying pressure to the seat in a certain way. Fuck if he wasn't right! Man, I'm gonna stop blowing that guy so damn much. Anyway, I am looking forward to riding Justin's spot soon and getting those bars from Darrell.
~J

Tax reform?

Ok, there are some scary phrases coming out of the mouth of Bush. "Tax reform" scares me. My boss, who is a republican for no other reason than because he hates democrats, told me that 2% of the people in America pay the bulk of the taxes, which sounded to me like a mathmatical impossibility. He told me that when you make more than 200k a year, you're paying 40% of your income to taxes, which also sounded like a pile of shit as well. And according to Cheney's baby, Factcheck.org, http://www.factcheck.org/article118.html they are already inflating and distorting there own plan. Now, if you do a search for a breakdown of how much tax was paid by income, you won't find much. I didn't. Why is that? Well, hmmmm, let me think. I think it is because you can't determine a person's real income, if they don't want you to. Someone who claims a taxable income of $20k, may have actually taken in $40. Tax talk is all bullshit, to me. I don't believe that the people who make money and can afford to flex their political muscle are paying the lion's share. I don't believe that letting the very wealthy keep more money means that they feel obligated to spend that money in a way that will benefit this country. I do believe that greed feeds greed and that hoarding is a product of greed. It takes money to make money, and what else do I need to know? Once again, it comes down to the media, as far as I am concerned. When an otherwise intelligent man believes bullshit like that SIMPLY because he was fed it by a republican source, I am further convinced that "1984" was a prediction, rather than fiction.
~J

Good point

Anonymous said...
the only problem with killing off bush is that you would have to knock off serveral people before you would get to a liberal... You have to remeber the order of asention top the preseidancy and there are some that are not far down the list that would be even worse than Bush. They make his policies look weak and liberal
7:41 PM

Yes, that is a very good point, to which I respond...I don't care about getting a liberal or conservative into office. I would vote for John McCain in a heartbeat. Now, that said, I am willing to let several of the Bush administration's top office holders perish. Not a single fucking tear from me. Thanks for commenting, too. I like intelligent people. You wouldn't happen to be female, single...large breasts, would you?
~J

Big, back pussy

Yes, I have a rather large pussy, which is black and hairy. His name is Oliver and he is all black and he is large. Most people who see him for the first time say, "Wow! That is the biggest cat I have ever seen!" I love snugging up my pussy. My pussy purrs when I stroke him. I like the fact that my pussy is hairy, but the hairs get all over. My pussy is too big for me, so I have tried to give him away to almost anyone who likes big, black, hairy pussy. Many people have taken my pussy for a night, but in the end, they reject him. Poor pussy. Poor, poor, big, black, hairy pussy.
~J

Doom

Ok, I think I am handling the defamation of our nation pretty well. I didn't even think about murder for several hours. Well, ok, maybe it was about an hour. I am in a state of disbelief at the ignorance this country showed last night. I am seriously disgusted with my countrymen. I am further disgusted with the media and most of all, I am thouroghly disgusted with my 'government.' Yes, I am an atheist. Yes, I think religion and faith are two different things. Yes, I think religion should be punishable by death. The campaign ran by Bush offended me deeply for many reasons (one the main ones being that it insulted my intelligence) but perhaps the biggest reason of all is his use of people's faith. I truly don't care if he prays, don't care if he loves Jesus, don't care if he is a devout Christian - his faith is his own business and I don't mind at all keeping my nose out of it. I have my doubts on those issues for no other reason than because he has broken commandments left and right, but anyway...
He played to the christian sector like a whore, desperate for a rock. His blatant boot-licking technique of sucking up by proclaiming his faith to an obscene degree made me furious. It's one thing to align your issues with the christian faith. It's quite another to have no issues and use religion to secure votes through fear. I am deeply convinced that Bush and Cheney are politcally corrupt, if not morally. America showed the world that we are sheep, last night. Fanatics blind to the impact of our fanaticism. Ignorant or uncaring of the role we play in the great scheme of the modern paradigm. What does that mean? It means voting in another Bush has fueled terrorism that the Bush administration says they will protect you from. It means that schools, seniors and those without healthcare (ME!!) will lose more ground. It means that America is growing weaker, more fearful and more brainwashed. Read "1984" by George Orwell, then you'll understand where my murderous thought stem from. Damn, I hope we get a good assasination this time!!
~J

Dreams

Ok, I have had some really strange dreams. I had one where I remember I was driving a dune buggy while the cops chased us because we had just robbed a bank. On the steering wheel sat a naked woman and I was giving her oral sex. She tasted the same way that a 9-volt battery tastes when you press your tongue to it....man. I have had dreams where I am riding and I can feel how everything thing is supposed to happen to do some freaky impossible trick. Every woman I know has nightmares fairly often. My mother has some of the most disturbing nightmares I have ever heard of. It's a wonder she can even sleep at all. She has described some horrific scenes that play out in her mind on a fairly regular basis. I have rarely had nightmares throughout my life. I dreamed once that I was riding downtown at night an suddenly a nuke went off a few miles away. I turned toward it and watched it (impossible...it was a dream, stupid) and thought, "Wow, so that's what it looks like." I wasn't scared in the least. I also have dreams where I'll be somewhere, like a mall, and I'm dressed like a woman, but nobody notices and I'm freaking out because I don't want anyone to see me dressed like that. So I'm trying to get out of the woman's clothes, but they won't come off. I know you have ideas about THAT one. Lately I have had a lot of riding dreams...and with the kids living with me, now...that is where I do most of my riding-in my dreams.
~J